This is basically me saying, I've seen these movies and I'm a lazy bitch who doesn't want to write three separate reviews for it. Here's how Quickies will work, I'll sum up my thoughts on a movie in one short paragraph and one image/gif. Yes? No? Maybe? I don't know, can you repeat the question? Admit it you're singing the Malcolm in the Middle theme song right now. Good luck getting that out of your head. Onward with the reviews then!
The Woman in Gold (You've Obviously never Been to An Indian Wedding)
To sum it up; Tatiana Maslany (give her that goddamn Emmy already!) = YAAAS! Helen Mirren = YAAAS! Ryan Reynolds = Ryan Reynolds. Daniel Bruhl = I love you but you were meh! Katie Holmes = And you're still acting because....? Charles Dance = This is what Tywin Lannister would do if he lived in our present time. The story was intriguing enough but a little cheesy at times. However, a little cheese can go a long way; like Romano cheese on a Fettuccine Alfredo. Critics didn't think it was gold, neither did I, but it's at least a silver. 4/5 stars.
Child 44 (Say it with a russian accent)
Tom Hardy is love, Tom Hardy is life! Seriously though,his acting skills are as impressive as his perfection of a face! Tom Hardy is also the only redeeming factor in this movie. Fucking shaky cam! I wanted to shake that camera all the way up the director's ass! The plot was intriguing though but the execution was less than satisfactory. However, Mr.Hardy's performance was amazing enough to make this movie enjoyable for what is was. Say it with me now, Tom Hardy is love, Tom Hardy is life. That is all. 3.5/5 stars.
Ex Machina (Oscar Isaac's Hips Don't Lie)
Now this has been one of my favorite movies of this year, right after Kingsman: The Secret Service (THAT MOVIE WAS GLORIOUS!!!). I love movies that make you think and actually question if it could reflect a similar future in our reality. The actors are phenomenal in this movie. The force is strong with Domhnall Gleeson and Oscar Isaac. Even with that ridiculous recluse beard, Oscar Isaac manages a panty drop moment when he displays his dancing skills. Yep you heard right, dancing in a movie about A.I. One criticism I have is about Alicia Vikander, sometimes she plays it a little too strong with her humanity instead of displaying she's a robot. Now this wouldn't be an issue if she kept it up through the whole movie. There are cuts when she's more robotic and cuts when she's more human. If it was a natural progression from robot to human, then GREAT, but it's not so it can be off sometimes. She needs to take a page from boyfriend Michael "Fassy" Fassbender and his performance in Prometheus. I don't want to give too much away about this. Just know that you should see it. 4.5/5 stars.
Avengers: Age of Ultron (Chris Evans = 50 Shades of Red, White & Blue)
Okay, the reason why I didn't take my time with this review and decided to get it over with here is because I was slightly disappointed with this movie. Oh God I feel the death stares and death wishes of fanboys everywhere. Listen, I'm not saying it was bad. It was actually pretty darn entertaining but I felt that the action sequences looked like some Avengers faboys were playing a game version of the fights. It wasn't as well done as the first movie. I didn't particularly enjoy the addition of the twins and Quicksilver was WAAAAAAY cooler in X-Men: Days of Future Past; and you know I love Aaron Taylor-Johnson. Their Russian accents were meh. Um, listen to Tom Hardy's Russian accent and then listen to theirs. I'm surprised Russians were offended by Child 44 but not this portrayal here. There's humor....yes, the stakes are high.....yes, Ultron was bad-ass.....yes, the chemistry of the cast was one of the best aspects of the movie....yes, this movie is fun to watch with a big crowd.....yes, Chris Evans would probably taste like apple pie if I eat him....yes. Still.....4/5 stars for me.
And with that we're done. Hope you're a satisfied customer ;) Sorry, I have a crude sense of humor. Deal with it!
Hope you had a Reel Good Time!
-Vidya
-Vidya